TYREE COLUMN: Are we prepared for lawyer robots to do our suing? | Opinion

TYREE COLUMN: Are we ready for lawyer robots to do our suing? | Opinion

Remember back in school when you made fun of the bookworms who just regurgitated facts? Now we bow down to computer programs that … regurgitate facts. (“Yeah, it regurgitates facts, but it regurgitates them so CHEAPLY. And doesn’t narc about wedgies.”)

If the apps are going to be as eager-to-please as Siri and Alexa, you’ll have to tell all your friends to take the precaution of turning them off around you. (“I waited for you at the wrong restaurant. So, SUE me. Wow! That subpoena was fast!”)

I, for one, will miss the human touch of picking up on nuances and context. Go to an app with a complaint of “My boss gave me the SHAFT,” and you’re likely to hear the mellifluous tones of Isaac Hayes singing, “Who is the man that would risk his neck for his brother, man? Can ya dig it?”

There’s still something to be said for the benefits of living, breathing lawyers. The attorney who prepared my mother’s will was aided by the fact that he has known the family for years. In this era of the “internet of things,” I’m not sure I want my VIRTUAL lawyer knowing so much about me. (“My friend the water heater tells me you’ve been taking awfully long showers. And, oh, the stories your electric scales could – and do – tell…”)

Is society ready for automated “ambulance chasers” that can declare, “If I can just get wi-fi to connect, I’ll STOP that ambulance ahead, dead in its tracks!”?